Koniec nauki - trochę fun ;p

1. A little boy asks a driver : - Could you give me a ride, please? I'm late for school.
- But I'm heading in the opposite direction, son.
- Even better!

2. In the morning Jasio is getting up and walking up to the window. His mum is asking him :
- What's the weather like today?
- I don't know. It's so heavy rain that I can't see anything. - the boy answers.

3. ON WHAT FALLING IN LOVE IS LIKE
- Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life.

4. Q: Who designed Noah's ark?
A: An ark-itect !

5. Q: What was the greatest accomplishment of the early Romans ?
A: Speaking Latin !

6. Q: Who succeeded the first President of the USA ?
A: The second one !

7. Q: If Atlas supported the world on his shoulders, who supported Atlas ?
A: His wife !

8. Tom wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Tom looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table:
"Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love you."
So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating.
Tom asks, "Son, what happened last night?"
His son says, "Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door." Confused, Tom asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"
His son replies, "Oh that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you said, "Lady, leave me alone, I'm married!"
A self-induced hangover - $100.00
Broken furniture - $200.00
Breakfast - $10.00
Saying the right thing - Priceless

9. Instead of getting married.
Just find a girl you don't like and buy her a house.

10. The Devil walks into a crowded bar. When the people see who it is,they all run out except this one old man. So the devil walks up to him and says" Do you know who I am?" and the old man sips his beer and answers "yep". The Devil says "Well, why aren't you afraid of me?" The old man looks over and says" I've been married to your sister for 27 years, why the hell should I be scared of you."

11. A wife asked her husband if he is planning to do anything for their annivarsary. The husband looks at her and replies "Where we are from we don't cellabrate mistakes."